3 Major Dating Red Flags from Author & Podcaster Jay Shetty
Relationships March 13, 2023
Do you think you know real love? It may be harder than you think to really know!
Jay Shetty is a number one New York Times bestselling author, award-winning podcast host of “On Purpose,” and chief purpose officer of the Calm app.
Jay is touring the world right now promoting his new book “8 Rules of Love: How to Find It, Keep It, and Let It Go,” and he made a special stop to “The Jennifer Hudson Show” to talk about love!
“Love is so critical to the quality of our lives,” Jay told Jennifer Hudson on the March 13 episode. “I feel like so many of us are single and looking for love, so many people are in relationships and have lost the spark, so many people have just broken up or had a divorce and they want to refind love within themselves.
“We’ve talked a lot about physical health, we’ve talked a lot about mental health, but I don’t think we’ve talked about relationship health enough,” said Jay. “So I wanted to put a spotlight on that.”
Jay hopes to teach others about the difference between true love and something more like infatuation. He defines love as having the following three components: 1) When you know someone’s personality, 2) You respect their values, and 3) You are committed to seeing them achieve their goals.
He also shared three big dating red flags to watch out for:
1) Saying ‘I love you’ too soon
“Hearing the words I love you that early on, it’s like, that person doesn’t even know you let alone love you,” said Jay of saying or hearing a declaration of love too early in a relationship.
2) Watch out for the ‘halo effect’
“The halo effect is when you like one thing about someone, but you assume that means they have lots of other good qualities,” explained Jay. For example, “If someone went to a good school, you think they must be organized. Or you think if someone has a good job, they must be a good person.”
3) Understand the ‘context effect’
“Let’s say you just walked out of a romantic comedy at the theaters,” Jay told JHud. “You’re more likely to believe, research says, that someone you bump into is going to be a likely partner. Or if you bump into someone at a wedding, you think that’s someone you’re meant to be with because you’ve just been surrounded by love.”
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That’s not all! According to Jay, you’re more likely to have warmer feelings for someone if you share a warm drink, like coffee, with them! “Have a cold drink, and then you’ll know if you really have feelings for this person!” advised Jay.
Jay's book “8 Rules of Love” is available for purchase at 8RulesofLove.com and wherever books are sold. To catch Jay on his first-ever world tour, go to JayShettyTour.com for tickets.
“The Jennifer Hudson Show” airs weekdays. Here’s when to watch in your area.